translates essential newborn care into gaming terminology you understand. Master sleep schedules, unlock soothing techniques, and establish winning routines—all while maintaining your player status.

Whether you're facing a 3 AM crying session or trying to establish a feeding schedule that doesn't conflict with raid night, this guide translates essential parenting skills into language and concepts that resonate with gaming culture. Think of it as your ultimate walkthrough for the most important game you'll ever play.