Why you're funny with your friends and turn into an NPC around strangers
If this is you, you are not two different people.
You are one person with two attention settings.
Around friends, your attention is out. You notice what they said. You react. You add. The next line shows up because you are actually in the conversation.
Around new people, your attention flips inward. You start watching yourself. How you sound. How you look walking over. Whether everyone can tell you are trying. That internal camera eats the bandwidth you need to listen, so of course you go blank.
This is why "just be yourself" is useless advice. Yourself is already fine. The camera is the problem.
A cleaner sequence:
Notice you are watching yourself.
Put attention on one real thing: their words, their energy, or the room.
Pick a thread from what they just said.
React or share one beat. Then stop.
You do not need a better personality. You need to get out of your own camera long enough to respond to what is in front of you.
Awkward pauses are allowed. Recovering is the skill.