Most households only talk about scams after someone already sent the money.

You don't need a security degree. You need ten quiet minutes once a week, same time as coffee.

Here's the check I run:

1. Texts (2 min)

Open the family group thread. Ask: did anyone get a "your package is held" text, a bank alert, or a "Mom I need gift cards" message this week? Screenshot it. Don't tap the link.

2. Parents' email (3 min)

Sit with whoever still clicks first and ask. Look at the last few unread messages. Fake invoices, "your Microsoft password expired," IRS refunds. If the sender name and the actual email don't match, it's trash.

3. Kids' apps (3 min)

One device. Check who can message them, whether unknown accounts can slide in, and if in-app purchases are locked. Game chats are where impersonation starts now, not email.

4. One rule for the fridge (2 min)

Write this down: we never send money, codes, or gift cards from a text or a call. We hang up and call the number on the card or the official site.

That's it. Ten minutes. No software install.

The households that get hit usually aren't careless. They're busy. A weekly check is how you stay ahead of the next fake FedEx text.

Start here: the one rule that beats every scam

I build and protect networks and cloud systems for a living. A few years ago I realised the attackers I deal with at work had moved on to easier targets: our parents, our kids, and us on a busy Tuesday.

Every scam, from the fake bank call to the cloned voice of a grandchild, depends on one thing: the scammer controls the conversation. They called you. They texted you. They chose the number on your screen.

So the rule is:

HANG UP. LOOK UP. CALL BACK.

End the conversation they started. Find the real number yourself, on the back of your card, your statement, or the official app. Start a new conversation on that number. A spoofed caller ID cannot survive that. A cloned voice cannot answer a phone you dial.

Teach it to your parents this week. Teach it to your kids. The instruction "don't hang up" or "stay on the line" is, by itself, proof you are talking to a criminal.

The Family Firewall is the full version of this: a 57-page guide and 8 printable tools that lock down your parents' phones, your own accounts and your kids' apps in one weekend, screen by screen. Members also get a one-page Scam of the Month sheet here every month.

If you have a question about a call or text your family received, post it below. I answer.