Almost every beginner speaker asks me the same thing: "how do I stop saying um?"

Wrong question. "Um" isn't actually the problem — it's a symptom. The real problem is that you're afraid of silence, so your mouth fills the gap before your brain has caught up.

Here's the fix I teach after PREP clicks for people:

• Let the silence exist. A 1-2 second pause after a question feels like an eternity to you — it reads as thoughtful to everyone listening. Nobody has ever thought less of a speaker for pausing to think.

• Swap the sound for a breath. Next time you feel an "um" coming, close your mouth and inhale instead. It buys you the same half-second, but it sounds deliberate instead of anxious.

• Anchor to your PREP point. If you already know your Point before you open your mouth (see last week's post), you have far less to "fill" — the silence has a destination.

The goal isn't zero filler words overnight. It's noticing the moment right before you'd say "um," and choosing a breath or a pause instead. Do this in low-stakes conversations this week — ordering coffee, answering a coworker — before you try it somewhere that matters.

Where do you catch yourself filling silence the most — video calls, live Q&As, or just everyday conversation? Drop it below and I'll tailor the next post to it.

If you've ever been asked a question in a meeting, interview, or on camera and felt your brain just... shut off — you're not broken, you're just missing a structure.

Here's the framework I teach beginners first, because it works in literally any unscripted moment: PREP.

• Point — say your main idea in one sentence

• Reason — give the one core reason why

• Example — back it up with a quick real example

• Point — restate your main idea to close

That's it. Four steps, and you never have to "figure out what to say" in real time again — you just fill the container.

Why it works: most freezing happens because your brain is trying to plan an entire answer at once. PREP breaks it into single, sequential steps, so you're never staring at a blank page. It also naturally limits you to ONE idea, which reads as more confident than rambling through three half-formed ones.

Try it right now: get someone to ask you a random opinion question, and silently label your answer P-R-E-P before you speak. Notice it doesn't take any longer to think — it just sounds 10x more organized.

What's the moment where you freeze up the most — interviews, meetings, or something else? Curious what people here struggle with most.